Way To Dawn
by gloss my eyes
Summary: Weddings are for mourning, in some cases. [SoRiku]


**Way To Dawn**

* * *

How does one begin to answer such questions? Too few paths, despair behind every door.

The solutions are there, it seems, tying thick ropes to his ankles and shackling him into place against the sandy shore. He could run; slip back into the darkness that had beckoned him with warm, slippery hands, reaching for him from the very first fork in the road. _Follow me_ , it had whispered, gently against the curve of his neck like a forgotten lover.

It called to him now, feet sunk in against the sand, rooted firmly into the place. The anchor to the sea before him yanked enticingly at his ankle, urging one step forward at a time until he was all but submerged.

It would have been so easy, so final.

 _No more heartache_ , it purred, a breath of a whisper tickling his ear. _No more pain_. Freedom - the word loaded like a gun at his head - urged him on, a slow slide of his show against the uneven sand he stood upon. One more step and he'd be halfway in. All it took was temptation, redemption, open arms and inviting with the waves that lapped at his feet.

Riku shifted his head, restlessly, his frown curling into a self-depracting smirk. The easy way out, it seemed, trapped enticingly at the forefront of his troubled mind.

It had always been this way, one way or another. Riku had been faced with many pathways, many doors - he'd chosen wrong, one too many times. Always a part of the darkness; or rather, he'd let it become a part of him. Even his eyes now, a storm of teal and green and grey, swirled with doubt and perhaps a hint of the darkest shade of gold; selfishness at its finest. He'd thought he had found a way to keep it in check but yet there it was, hidden beneath his everlong bangs of silver. That cold, hard feeling he'd been trying to leave behind him, especially when they made contact with eyes as blue as the ocean he stared at longingly.

Sora.

He noticed Sora everywhere, whether he deigned to or not. The smell of his aftershave lingered in his nose, the aroma of sea-salt ice cream. The way his chocolatey brown hair spiked in every which way, begging lithe fingers to run though the strands, take a little of the feel of silken, dusty strands for himself and lock it away to fantasize about later. The bright sunshine smile that was always a little more for Riku, always a little more loving and tender than those he shared with anyone else.

Sora, despite all Riku had ever done to him, smiled at Riku like he was still the best damn present this universe or any other could have bestowed upon him.

Riku didn't deserve it. He knew this. Knew it as much as he knew how weak we truly was, deep inside where the darkness lay dormant, waiting for the silver haired man to mess up and turn all of their lives around for the worst.

So he sighed softly to himself, rummaging through the edge of the beach until he found a prime candidate for a skipper, watching with cold eyes as it made it's way far enough to sink to the bottom on the ocean. Perhaps it could be considered poetic; Riku was the rock that had sunk then all. It was far enough time to share the same fate.

Only it was sunset, he noticed belatedly, staring with empty eyes across the retreating sun behind the horizon. Only then did a voice clear their throat; timid, at first, sure they'd interrupted a very private moment.

"Riku," Sora whispered; forlonly, slightly hopeful. "I thought I might find you sulking around here." His battle skills had taught him the art of stealth well; Riku hadn't been aware of his approach, shrugging it off in an excuse of being distracted.

"I'm not sulking," retorted the older boy morosely, which of course, only weakeaned his argument.

Sora spared no further comment on his friends distress however, appearing near his side with a well tailored tuxedo adorning his body and a plate of white cake balanced in one hand. His free hand he reached out sympathetically, patting his older friends shoulder once in a show of comfort or comraderie of both.

"Didn't want you to miss the cake," said Sora easily, usual cheer in his tone only strained minimally. "Kairi wanted carrot cake, of all things, but I convinced her to use the special recipe that's been in my family for generations. Something about usuing bits of Paopu fruit, you know. Entertwined destinies." He laughed then, though carefulness coated his tone.

Riku peripherally perused the sweet, careful to arrange his face in a passive manner whether Sora's confession surprised him or not. "As if everyone's destinies aren't tied together enough," he grumbled, though he took the plate of sweets with trembling hands regardless. He added venomously, skimming the lines of Soras tan face, "I bet she loved sharing it with you."

It took a long moment for a response, filled with the sound of Riku shoveling a forkful into his mouth. It tasted of sweet and tangy sunshine, the tropical juices of the fruit coating his tongue before his friend next to him whispered soft and sad, almost: "I didn't."

Riku choked on the icing; choked on the sweet confection of tang and sugary starshine and just a hint of love when he bit off a startled, " _What_?"

The eyes next to him, the eyes he had stared at so deeply whoever he couldn't help himself, regarded the wading sunset with a small, defeated smile seated just below.

"I couldn't, Riku. I know it's our wedding day, but..." And here Sora trailed off, using the edge of his thumb to swipe away a speck of frosting from the others lips, popping it into his mouth like it had happened many times before (it had, though Riku knew not how many times.) "I'm kinda slow about these things, you know. And it isn't like I don't love her," Sora amended quickly, his smile turning sheepish. "I just don't love her in the way that she deserves."

Waves, Riku noticed distantly, were lapping at his feet. They served to stifle the silence a little bit, what with Sora staring out at the glistening water and Riku staring at him; for once, at a complete loss for words or actions or even a start of where to begin to unravel this bizarre concept his best friend had just presented him with.

He settled on saying, feebly, the threads of hope weaving subtly through the words, "so...you love someone else, instead? The way that you thought you loved Kairi?"

And Sora laughed - softly at first, tentatively, as though he couldn't quite believe it himself yet. He turned his smile on Riku then; brilliant, wholesome, and alive.

"Why else would I be standing with you alone on this play beach, sharing the most romantic cake in this world or the next?"

Riku felt the anchor pull at his ankles again, tugging him out to sea; instead he dropped to his knees, clutching the dark trousers of the boy he loved - had _always_ loved - and snorted in a way that half reminded him of a sob.

And Sora, the angel, let him stumble through his emotions - the ones he'd tried so hard to fight - like the longing, the hope, the desperation. He remembered the way he'd torn the wedding invition into two the day he received it, remembered how his heart had given a pitiful shake in his chest. But through it all, forming a new path in his life, one where the darkness wasn't his only option, Riku glimpsed the road to dawn.

He stood then on wobbly knees, wiping away the last of silent tears streaming their way down pale cheeks. Riku took a tan cheek in his free hand, and guided himself back home; a chaste brush of lips against lips, of the darkness seeking light one final time.

And once the moment had passed, Riku swore he could count every star twinkling in the depths of those ocean blue eyes.

"So," Sora said, clearing his throat in an endearing way, blushes all around, "how about that cake now?"

Riku smiled, slinging an arm around those broad shoulders that had carried the world -hell, they'd carried him more than once, and laughed. "Bet I can eat it all before you even lift up your fork, you dork."

The squabbling started not after, lifting the vice from Riku's heart in a way only Sora could. And if anywhere had ever been home for the boy lost at sea, it was here in the warm summer sand, basking in the glow of light that could only be Sora.


End file.
